I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
