Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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