so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
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What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
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i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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