I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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