exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
