someone get that fucking seahorse.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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