im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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