Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
