On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
