What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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