Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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