yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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