with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men