I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
