i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
