I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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