I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
