I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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