Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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