Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
