I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
