READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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