no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
