I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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