I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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