That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Randomize
