im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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