It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
