Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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