I am puke
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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