Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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