your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
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