Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...

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(716): View more from New York

since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?

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(404): View more from Georgia

"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made

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(609): View more from New Jersey

ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

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27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Read it at the TFLN blog
(503): View more from Oregon

And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....

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(313): View more from Michigan

She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.

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(707): View more from California

Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god

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(214): View more from Texas

I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce

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