singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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