He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
