You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
