they need to just BURY HIM!
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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