We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
