My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
