Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
