awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
