i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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