i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't want my vagina anymore.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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