Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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