Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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