We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
