kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
