That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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