she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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