planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize