And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
